Walk with God!

 Walk with God

As we are about to start another year may we think about how we can walk with God. We are all maxed out so how can we pour water into others the way Christ pours life into us if we allow him to? How can we love, forgive, understand, and have true understanding for another? How can we be friends to our enemies and see them as children of God’s?

Many times in life we feel like we have nothing to give. Other times we feel like they who have hurt us don’t deserve forgiveness or we can’t overlook another’s past. When we do this we not only put limits on us but we put limits on others. Are we not all children of God’s trying to do the best we can in this life. Do we not all need to be forgiven and remembered? We all need friends and we can only gain true friendships by first being a friend.

You want a year that will not only change you but you will remember forever? Then get to work! Lead others to Christ by them knowing you. Let’s define what it looks like to know Christ. To really know Christ we have to love others the way he loves us. That means instead of finding reasons to judge find reasons to love. We all need to love and to be loved.

We all have the power to change this world by allowing Christ more in this world and it starts with us. So stop being so afraid of the Devine in us and allow our light to shine in this dark world! The world needs us to shine because the world needs the savior more than ever before. The world can be a dark place but it will become brighter as we allow our light to shine by simply loving others and loving the amazing person we are!

Allow this year to be the year we stop playing small and allow ourselves to be the light and rock others can relay on! We all have more power than we ever imagined possible!

If you are struggling loving the amazing person you are then do the work to see yourself clearly. We are children of God’s who will become brighter, powerful, and more knowledgeable than we ever imagined possible! One day so long as we make the right choices we will become a God or goddess. Start to realize that and how much God trusts and loves us. If a god loves us then we need to learn to love the amazing person we are! Stop playing small and allow yourself to shine this year!

Season of miracles!

 Do we really remember the reason behind this season? How many times this past year has the Lord given each of us miracles that we can't explain in any other way? The savior was born for each one of us. The day before Christmas can we all take a minute to remember the reason of tomorrow. What tomorrow means. To me Christmas reminds me no matter how alone I may feel I'm never alone. No matter how I may feel like I can't do something I always can so long as I have the savior in my life helping me. It reminds me that the savior is still alive and because of that no matter how I may be feeling today tomorrow will always hold promise and all will never be lost. Miracles still happen today thanks to the Lord. So many blessings that I never imagined possible happen thanks to the Lord. 

May we give him the gifts he's already given to us. May we give him our hearts, time in service to his children, forgiveness for those who have wronged us. A heart that wants the best for all around us, especially for those who have hurt us. A willing heart to go through anything the Lord or others throw our way. A heart that is full of gratitude for all the good Lord has given to us. A heart that remembers the many miracles that have happened to us. 

This year for me is full of gratitude and hope and I want to personally thank my heavenly father and brother who gave his life for me personally. This year I have seen miracles I never imagined possible! I have seen my brother turn himself in so that he can have a fresh start to a better life for him. I have seen the man I'm in love with turn his heart and life towards the savior. I now have hope that although today may be hard that the future holds promise. I have seen my heart Start to slowly heal. So no matter what you may be going through today may you always remember thanks to tomorrow that there's always hope for tomorrow. Thank you Lord for giving us your life and always carrying us through this life. I want the world to know that I Brittany Ann Gotberg love my savior so much and I give my heart to him! 

God love never gives up!

 Christ doesn’t give up, no matter the price

Something I learned the other day was Christ like love doesn’t give up no matter the price. It sees the good in a person. It looks for the good in a person no matter how hard it might be to do so. After all Don’t we all have the desire to be understood, loved, and appreciated for all that we do?

Many times all we see is what we are doing and going through. How many times do we look outside of ourselves to truly think about others? When we get outside of ourselves we find it easy to love others. Loving others is about them and not you.

When we are in relationships with another it should be about them and not us. Why do you think being in a healthy relationship is so hard? My mom the other day taught me that how we know that something is important and worthwhile is if it’s hard.

As I have been in a new, wonderful, and healthy relationship I’m learning that I am the only one who can change. I have to be willing to allow myself to become more understanding, more loving, more compassionate, more willing to look outside of myself.

What I have gained is everything! I have gained a relationship where I’m not too much. I’m enough as I am. I’m getting closer to God by being with Jerome. I’m loved and he's always doing better in learning how I need to be loved. He asks questions to understand why I feel what I do. He’s teaching me to think about others and less about myself. To be honest with my feelings, to think about what I want in life, to think more positive than I usually do.

Is the relationship hard? Yes it is, but I am learning how to be more Christ like in all areas of my life. God never gives up on us. He’s always forgiving no matter how hard we fall so long as we repent and do better. I’m so grateful for the lessons that I have been learning from being in this relationship and hopefully I’m becoming more Christ like and loving from where I am in life.

If we as society would learn how to always be doing better, be more forgiving and accepting, be more loving we would have less broken families and marriages. After all we all fail at times. No body is perfect and it's by work and understanding that we can be doing better. 

I hope you dance

 As Christmas drawers closer I have been thinking about this year. How hard and amazing it’s been. How much I have overcome to become this amazing person that I am today. I have been thinking about everything I have been blessed with. How I can use my gifts and talents to bless the lives of those I love.

This is the week of finals so I have been thinking about who I was at the beginning of the semester and who I am at the end. At the beginning of the semester, I was struggling with understanding my purpose in life. Who am I and what value does my life have? I felt so alone and honestly was struggling with getting in the grove of being back at school after more than a decade of being out. By the middle of the semester, I wanted to drop out of school and honestly felt like I was failing so why continue? At the middle of the semester, I had my first at fault accident that totaled my car so that was hard to deal with not having a car again as well. At the beginning of the semester, I was single and wanted to leave Texas to move back to Utah where I felt like home was.

At the end of the semester, I look back and I am so grateful for this opportunity I have had to be able to go back to school. I am so grateful that my boyfriend talked me into staying in school and following my dreams in life. I am so grateful that I have learned who I am this semester. I am a daughter of God who has more possibilities that I never imagined possible. I have this drive and motivation to help those around me in all areas of my life. I have been able to see that I never failed instead I was becoming a strong, faithful, and determined person all my life. God had never left me, and he never will so long as I don’t leave his side. I am grateful that I learned to ask for help when in need instead of trying to do it on my own, because there will always be people who want to help. If you don’t ask for help, then you will stay stuck and you will fail because nobody can do everything on their own. We all stand in need of help from time to time. At the same time do what you can on your own. Believe in yourself and that you can do hard things. At the end of the semester, I am not alone anymore. I am beginning to see a future in which I can finally have roots planted again in my life. I don’t see myself leaving Texas anymore. I see a future in which the pain from the past no longer must hold me back instead it can be building blocks towards a great life. I am falling more in love by the day and I’m so grateful to a loving father who has always been leading my life towards this day.

Yesterday was my last day in my favorite class of the semester, my psychology class. In class she played “I Hope You Dance.” She talked about how when she was in her first year of her master’s program she wanted to drop out until she heard this song. She was also feeling suicidal and much of the way I felt most of this semester. When she heard this song, it reminded her that she had to dance her way though her masters and she could if she made the choice to do so no matter how hard it got. To never take a breath for granted. It was soon after this that things in her life started to get better and she did finish her masters.

Learn to set your dreams and goals high. Learn to Dream. Believe in yourself. Remember whose you are. You are a child of God’s. You will become a God or Goddess one day. Do we really understand this? Do we understand why we are here? Do we understand that it’s in the trying times that we become the best version of ourselves? Do we understand that trails are needed in order for our eternal happiness? Do we understand that God wants us to be happy?

Don’t ever settle in life in any area. Don’t take a single day for granted. Learn to dance and never give up no matter how hard it becomes. After all, my sweet mother always taught me that anything worth anything will be hard. So, if something is hard look at what is this teaching and at the end of the day will this help us learn to become a God or Goddess. We all make a difference in this world for good or bad so what are you going to choose today?

Happiness is a choice we must all make. Although sometimes it’s the hardest choice we will ever make. Happiness, I have learned is having gratitude. You can have depression like I suffer from and still be happy. How is this possible? Our happiness and joy need to come from the savior. Only he can help us make the choice to be happy despite the trails and hardships we deal with in this life. Happiness is a choice we make each day, sometimes a choice we make by the minute. Happiness is not having a perfect life or not having hard times. Happiness is gratitude. Looking at our lives and being grateful for the things we do have. Remembering that we matter. Our lives have purpose and meaning. Happiness is work and many times is the hardest thing we can do in this life. So if you are looking for happiness look at the things you have been blessed with. Make the choice to ask God for help in being happy. If we look, seek, ask, work for, and open the door we will become happy with time that I do promise. Happiness does not take away the mental health problems we deal with, but it does help us overcome them. God wants happiness for all his children and that includes you! So, dance your way through life, choose to be happy and never take a single breath for granted.

What are gifts we can give to God?

 As Christmas drawers closer I have been thinking about how I can help make this Christmas different and better. What are the things I can give to the Lord this Christmas season? Some of the things I have come to are my time in service to those around me. After all God says whatever we do for the least among us is what we do for God so let's see who we can serve. Second our talents. We all have different gifts and talents so how can we use them to bless the lives around us? How can we use them to give glory to God? Third thing I found is find one person who you have had a hard time forgiving and be the bigger person and forgive them no matter how hard it might be to do so. Fourth find a loved one who is struggling this season and do something for them that costs no money but they will never forget. As we put the Lord the center of our thoughts and lives we will make this season one that will never be forgotten no matter how much we are struggling money wise. After all money doesn't buy happiness and never will. So what will buy happiness? Our time, service, forgiveness, and talents will buy not only our happiness, but the happiness of those around us. May the Lord bless this season for all of us. If you have any ideas please share! 

We always have something to share

 I have been struggling with life and feeling so overwhelmed that I thought why do a blog. I woke up at two in the morning and the thought that came to my mind is to share that we always have something to share with others around us. When we are feeling overwhelmed with life. When we are depressed, or grieving. When we are simply struggling in our lives how many times do we wonder do we even make a difference? Do we have anything to help others around us? Do we have anything in us to offer the world? 

The answers are yes we always have something to offer this world! When we are struggling and yet still smile at a person we are making a difference in the world. When we go out of our way to say hello to the person passing us on our walk we just made a difference. When we give a person a hug we just filled a person up who might be struggling themselves. When we keep fighting to stay on earth we are making a difference just by staying. When we call a friend or family when we are dying inside we are making a difference in their life. When we keep pushing ourselves in our family, career, or school we are making this world a better place for everyone. 

Satan loves to feel us with his lies that when we are struggling we have nothing to offer but that's simply not true. Many times this life is hard and trying but we always have something to offer those around us. All we have to do is offer the light in us to this world and let others know it's ok to not always be ok. After all there's nothing to feel ashamed about when life is getting to us. In fact in admitting that life is hard we are allowing others to do likewise. We are allowing others to realize that the very reason we will always have something to share is because of the savior and all he has done for each one of us. So yes it is ok to admit life is hard and you are doing the best you can in a trying time. Don't allow Satan to lie to you when life is getting to you that you have nothing to offer, after all it's by the small and simple things in life that great things are brought to pass. It's in our trying times we grow and have the most to give simply by being ourselves and not giving up! 

Live for christ

 Many times it's easier to say you will die for something or someone, but what are you willing to live for? Are you willing to live for christ? Do you honestly live your life in harmony to the gospel of Christ? Do you serve, sacrifice, love, and put others first? Do you live your life the way the savior lived his? 

Lately I have been looking at my own life I always thought I was doing a good job at living my life in harmony of the gospel. I thought I was putting the Lord first in my life. I thought I loved others the way the Lord wanted me to. Recently I have realized that I have been doing the bare minimum when it came to serving others around both in the church and my own family. I had been doing the minimum when it came to my callings in the church. 

I want others around me to know the savior because they knew me. What does that mean to live our lives in such a way that others know the savior because of me? It means realizing it is more important to say sorry than to be right. It means to put others before you especially when it hard to do so. It means to love unconditionally no matter how the other might treat you. To sacrifice your wants for the greater good. To pray to be used to build God's kingdom on this earth. It means to not judge another because you don't know why they do what they do, instead love them and pray for them. Ask for forgiveness when your own heart is breaking because of how they treated you. It means always doing the harder things in life because it's what Christ would do. Truly living our life the way Christ lived his in service to those around us. 

Living for Christ will always be the hardest thing we could ever do, but there's nothing more rewarding we could live our lives. Nothing that will have more of an affect on this earth. Dying for Christ is easy, but living for him is harder but more rewarding. So let's all live our lives for our Savior. 

How can we be united in a world that divides us?

 In a world that tries to divide us and tells how we are different how can we be united? I have found a few things with my relationship with my boyfriend. We are so different and from the outside I know others think how can we be together. We have different histories. Different cultures. Different stories. Different needs and wants. Even on the outside we are different. So what unites us and what does it teaches us on how to be united no matter our differences? 

I have found that you can look at the differences or you can find the things that you have in similar. Christ helps us find the things in common with people. When the savior is in the center of our lives we find time to serve, to love others. When we serve others we learn to love the other person no matter what might divide us. We learn that even though at first we thought we had nothing in common we have more things in common than first thought. My humble plea is each of us reach out to others who we might not be getting along with with pray, love, and service. I promise as you do so you will find miracles in your life that you never imagined possible. I would love to hear from you guys if times you have done my plea and the miracles that came to you personally. 

Mountains shall depart

 For the mountains shall depart and the hills be removed, but my kindness shall not depart from thee, neither shall the covenant of my peace be removed, saith the Lord that hath mercy on thee. States 3 nephi vs 10.

I have seen in my own life mountains that I never imagined moving move to pass. For many years I struggled with my health mentally, spiritually, and physically. A year ago when I had given up all hope for a healthy and happy life I finally found out what I had been struggling with for years. I found out that I had overian cancer which not only caused many health problems but had my hormones all over the place. I was given a wonderful priesthood blessing that stated that I was promised that the surgery would make me whole. I'm here a year later to state I have been given that promise. I have had the healthiest year of my life. I'm also becoming healed and happier in ways I never imagined possible. 

I had given up all hope for myself that things would improve. I was as low as a person could feel. I felt worthless, unlovable, and suicidal. This past year has been anything but easy but it has also helped me realize that I am a daughter of a loving father in heaven who has more worth and power than I ever imagined possible. I have seen miracles happen in my life that I know is because of God's love for me. So I know that just like God has removed the mountains in my life he will remove them from your life as well. Just have faith and trust in God that all he wants is what will be best for you. God loves you dearly and he cries when we hurt so don't lose hope for a brighter  future ahead that you simply can't see right now. 

Now is the time to prepare!

 This past conference we heard from our prophet that now is the time to prepare ourselves and the world for the Savior's second coming. We may not know how long or what hour the savior is coming, but he is coming and it's coming closer every day. Stop putting off things in our lives and get to work has been the call of our prophet. It takes time to prepare for something as grand as the second coming so stop telling yourself that you can talk to this or that person tomorrow now is the time. 

If you have left the church please come back we not only need what you have to offer, but you need what the gospel has to offer you. Until you come back you are missing blessings that could be yours for the taking. So come back to the gospel. Prepare yourself for the blessings of the temple. Study the gospel so when a person asks a question you are prepared before hand to answer their questions. Don't just believe, but study out the gospel and ask God the questions of your heart. Study until those questions are answered but make sure to go to the right places for the answers. 

When you go to church make sure to go with a positive attitude so you are prepared to welcome people who might be struggling in their testimony or who are new or just coming back. Get to know the people who are in your ward so they know that they are your brother or sister. Those are not just words but truth we are brothers and sisters in the gospel. Find ways to get outside of yourself to serve others around you. 

The world may be in darkness and storms may be coming in floods, but that means the world needs what the gospel has to offer more than ever before. This is the gospel of joy and glad tidings so may we show the world such. We are the people to prepare this world for the second coming of the savior and that should be exciting to realize how much God trusts us. 

Doing the work now for rewards of eternity

 God never said it would be easy, he only said it would be worth it. To me that means doing the hard work now for the blessings that will come. Having trust and faith that by doing hard things now God will bless you and your efforts. After all life was never meant to be easy, it was meant to help us grow and blossom to the person God always saw us able to become. Anything worth anything isn't going to be easy many times it will be the hardest thing we have ever done. No matter if things we are doing are building a family, going to school, working on our career, working on our relationship with our partner, or working on our relationship with God it all takes work, time, and effort on our part to be successful in all that we do. If we do the work we will be grateful in the future so don't lose hope when things get hard. 

Hope and joy is what the gospel is all about!

 In a world where there's depression, anxiety, fear, and such negativity where can we turn for hope and joy even happiness? We know that times are only going to get worse until the second coming so how can we get hope even in a world of such darkness? 

The answers have always been there for our taking. It comes from the gospel. God's plan is called the plan of happiness. That tells us that God wants us to be happy and hopeful. When we feel like we can't go on one more second that's when we need to get on our knees and ask for God's help. God wants to bless us and wants to give us hope no matter what happens in our lives. 

If we are still struggling but breathing it's not the end and it's never the end with God in our lives. We have the power of the priesthood on this earth. Our prophet gains the knowledge of things to come by talking to God face to face. Isn't those two things amazing? We are never without hope for good things to happen in the end for those who believe in God and live the gospel in its fullest. God cares about the questions and things we are struggling with and will carry us if we allow him to. 

Do we have things that are hard that we are going to go through in this life? Of course we are. We were sent here to test us to see what we are going to do with the life God has blessed us with. Even if we fall there's always hope and a way back to the blessings of the gospel because God's love is unconditionally there no matter what we only have to reach up and embrace it. So if you are struggling please do yourself a favor and honestly ask yourself are you allowing yourself to live the gospel in the fullest way possible and are you allowing Christ to carry your trails so you don't have to alone? If you are not don't be disappointed or discouraged just do better to level up and allow God's love and grace to carry you. Don't give up hope for a brighter future ahead for those who follow the Lord's plan for his children. 

Be as a small child

 As i have started a new chapter in my life as a daycare worker I have been thinking about the scriptures that speak about being as a small child. The love that children have are simply amazing especially the children that you can tell are being taught love in their homes. We need to be humble, teachable, lovable, friendly like a small child is. 

That now is my new goal in life to be like a small child in all things. Last night when I was in the room with the 3 and 4 year old they were climbing on my lap. Wanting to be held and loved. I realized that I am the same way I just want to be loved for the amazing person that I am and I realized that everyone has this same need to be loved for the fact that they are a child of God who has more worth than we can ever imagine. May we all think of others more and become more like a small child in all areas of our lives. 

Go after your dreams

 The last little while as school comes to the middle of the semester it's got me thinking about how overwhelming school can be at times. Lately I have been wanting to just quit and work full time so why haven't I dropped out? I know the why behind everything I do in school and I also know that it won't always be like this. So it keeps pushing me to be my best no matter how hard it might get. I see myself being able to help those who need help and being able to help them because I pushed myself. 

So how can you push yourself to grow, go after your dreams, and not give up because it's gotten hard? It starts with knowing your why behind what you want. Realize that it's going to be hard if it's worth something. Third your future self will thank you because you did the work to get to where you want to be in life. Fourth with the help of God you can do anything in this world no matter how hard it might be. After all God never said it would be easy he only promised that you will never have to do anything on your own. God has also said it will be worth it in the end. 

So dream, but make sure to dream big and push yourself to making it happen. You got this, no matter what your dreams are! Never forget that you are amazing and doing amazing things with the life God gave you. If I can do anything to help make your dreams come to pass or you need someone to push you just reach out because I want to see everyone make their dreams happen. 

Seeing ourselves the way God sees us

 What would change in our lives if we only saw what God sees in us? Often times we are the hardest judge of ourselves and feel like we either don't deserve good things to happen in our lives or we feel like we can't do hard things thinking that we are not strong enough, powerful enough, or not enough to do this hard thing. What would change if we stopped lying to ourselves and instead started to talk to ourselves the way God would? God would never talk down to any of his children so why do we do that to ourselves? 

We need to start to pray to God to help us see what he sees when he looks at us. We need to remember the love the savior had for each of us while on the cross and in the garden. The savior knew that we were and are worth hurting for because to heavenly parents we are everything! To them we are enough right where we are now, not when we get to this place in our lives. Not if we do this grand thing, but right now we are enough to God. 

Knowing the why in our lives

 We need to know the why we do something. This past weekend I got the chance to go to a young single conference in Dallas and there I learned so many things. One of which is finding the why in our lives. When we know the why behind everything in our lives we find the strength to continue on when things get hard. After all it's not a if things get hard but a when it gets hard. I don't care if it's having a successful marriage, raising children in the gospel, our jobs, or going to school we are not only managing many things but they are hard. So what will drive us to continue when it gets hard instead of giving up? It's the why in our lives so if you have not asked yourself why you are doing what you are then ask yourself and find the answer. 

I have asked myself that question of why and it has helped me continue to press forward in school. I have wanted to quit many times this semester because it's so hard and at times it feels discouraging but knowing that I want to be able to heal and give hope to others who are struggling and hurting. In order to do I need my schooling so it's given me this strength that I never knew I had. It's also giving me this drive to continue no matter how hard it might get so I know that knowing the why behind everything will help. 

Don't give up on yourself or your dreams because you never know when things will change. 

Don't be the one who throws the stones

 After something happened yesterday I came to realize that I have thrown more stones than I ever thought I had. God has said it's for us to love and for God to judge, because his judgement is perfect. How many times have you been the one who judges another based on their history, the fact that a person is a begger, or you have thought to yourself that a person is lazy or not doing there best in that moment? How many times have you judged another instead of loving the person and seeing them as nothing less than a child of God? 

I know that I have always believed I was a loving, forgiving person, yet I have failed to be so more times than I thought I had. We all need to do better to level up in our lives. We may never reach perfection in this life but we can always be leveling up. If we are always striving to be better one day we will get there, yet if we don't put our eyes to perfection we will never get there. What can you do today to both aim higher in your life but also show more love to those around you? How can you be more Christlike today and going forward? 

Even though I am ashamed of myself for what I had done yesterday I am grateful for the lessons I am learning because of what I had done. I am grateful that the last person I thought would come into my life to teach me how not to judge and how to be more forgiving and loving. God is mindful of each one of us his children. The love he has is more perfect, personal, and unconditional then we can ever imagine! 

The two great commandments are there to teach us that love is the most important thing we can learn in this life. To truly love is to be as like God as we can get in this life. God really is love and always will be! So if we want to be like God we must love ourselves, God, and others. It's so important that they are known as the two great commandments. 

Expect miracles!

 In the conference talk from Nelson our dear prophet The Power of Spiritual Momentum from April 2022 he says "Seek and expect miracles. Moroni assured us that “God has not ceased to be a God of miracles.” Every book of scripture demonstrates how willing the Lord is to intervene in the lives of those who believe in Him. He parted the Red Sea for Moses, helped Nephi retrieve the brass plates, and restored His Church through the Prophet Joseph Smith. Each of these miracles took time and may not have been exactly what those individuals originally requested from the Lord. In the same way, the Lord will bless you with miracles if you believe in Him, “doubting nothing.” Do the spiritual work to seek miracles. Prayerfully ask God to help you exercise that kind of faith. I promise that you can experience for yourself that Jesus Christ “giveth power to the faint; and to them that have no might he increaseth strength.” Few things will accelerate your spiritual momentum more than realizing the Lord is helping you to move a mountain in your life." 

I have found that in my own life I have had so many miracles happen. Since the time I was 12 I struggled with my health both physically and emotionally. I had been promised many times in priesthood blessings that my health would improve and I would lead a successful and happy life. For years I honestly felt like God was a god of lies until last year. In the most unexpected ways my health finally did improve after years of struggles with my health I finally had answers. I had two surgeries in just six months and with both it was miserable after the surgery until I healed. My nose surgery was both disgusting and it hurt more than I ever thought possible. I honestly didn't realize a nose could hurt so much and yet even with rsv I was able to breathe better than I had been able to with the common cold. My second surgery i had last year I had 15 tumors removed and more than half had been cancerous. I had been blessed with the fact that the cancer was found so early out. 

Although I wasn't thrilled about the fact that I had both surgeries a year later I'm grateful to a loving father in heaven who knew that I needed both surgeries in order to become healthy. Now I am in school and keep on pushing myself, but every day I feel the help of God in both my studies and in my hearing abilities. I hear every word my professors and classmates say for those who don't realize what a miracle it is to hear every word I am hard of hearing. As such I should be missing words, yet I'm not. The miracles happened in the least expected way, but I'm healthy, happier, and on my path to having a successful life. 

God is a God of miracles and I know as we pray, work for, and expect miracles to happen in our lives they will. Things we never imagined possible will be with the help of God! 

Hope in times of dark

 Hope is like the sun rising in the morning after a long night, 

Hope is like the rainbow after a rain storm, 

Hope is never giving up especially when it's hard to do so, 

Hope is waiting for something to happen in your life, 

Hope is seeing the future in a bright manner, 

Hope is birds singing in the morning on a sunny morning, 

Hope is an open road to having a bright future ahead no matter what is going on now, 

Hope tells us that no matter where we are now it will get better for our future. 

Hope

 There's hope in the savior. Thanks to the love of a perfect man who suffered in ways we will never imagine possible there's hope in the future. There's hope that no matter how hard today is there's hope that it will get better. There's hope that today isn't the end. There's hope that things will always get better. There's hope that no matter what we may have done in the past it can be forgiven and forgotten by a loving god who has walked the painful, lonely path that nobody else has to if we only come to him. 

" God so loved the world that he gave us his only begotten. That though him all may have eternal life." God doesn't say if we live a perfect life. He doesn't say unless we have broken the law of the land. He doesn't say unless we have hurt one of his children. He says this to all, no matter what we may have done. No matter how far we may have walked away from God there's a way to come back if you choose so. His love can and will reach how far he needs to. There's no darkness, trail, challenge, or hardship that can't be overcome by a loving father and our Savior. 

This is the glad message of today! God lives and wants to bless us all he asks is for us to open the door. He has brought hope to my life in ways I never imagined possible. I continue to have more power, worth, happiness, joy, and peace in my life the more I allow God to be in my life. The more I put my will and life to God the more I am blessed in ways I never imagined possible! For the first time in my life I feel like I have a hopeful, happy life ahead for myself. I know that just like I have been blessed the more I truly trust God in all things so will you. All God asks is for you to come to him. All God asks is for us to open the door so God can enter our lives to bless us. Don't give up no matter how dark, hopeless, or hard your life is right now because God is a god of miracles! 

Forgiving yourself

 They say we are always hardest on ourselves than anyone else. How come we always have such a hard time forgiving when we are not perfect? We already have to deal with the consequences of our actions isn't that enough to deal with? Why do we think that not forgiving ourselves and still seeing the good in ourselves will somehow make it easier to handle? God has commanded us to forgive all mankind and that includes ourselves. We are commanded to forgive ourselves. As we do so we are able to move on in our lives, but if we don't forgive ourselves as well as others we become stuck. God's plan is one of happiness, that's what God wants for each of his children. No matter what you have done in the past do what you can to make it right and than forgive yourself. Ask for God's help to forgive yourself and make your decision today to always do the hard things in this life. I know that God will open up the way to be able to do so because his love is always there no matter what we might do. 

Being grateful for the life we live

 Today 23 years ago changed America. People woke up to start another day but never made it past lunchtime. May we take a minute to remember how much God has blessed us. How much we have. Go out of your way today to say thank you. To open a door for another. To send that text saying thank you to your family and friends because we are not promised tomorrow. To think about others and what they may need. To go out of our way to make the lives of those around us better because we are here. To be that hero to others who are struggling as we are all God's children, but many times those around us are struggling to just survive. We are disciples of Christs and as such have something the rest of the world are missing. May we find time today to do those things we keep telling ourselves we will but keep putting off because we are busy. Find time to make that difference today. 

God is a lover of effort

 I met a friend recently and getting to know him it's got me thinking a lot about how God is a lover of effort. My sweet mother growing up would always tell us kids I don't care about the grades you got, did you do your best. My mom always knew if we had done our best and if we had she always made sure we knew that she was proud of us. But, boy if we had gotten a b but she knew that we had not done our best she would ask why didn't you do your best? On the other hand I remember one time I had gotten an f in a class but I had worked the hardest I ever had before and still failed the class I was so disappointed with myself. I remember going home in tears when grades came out that day. My mom asked what was wrong like she always did when we were sad growing up so I told her that I failed my math class. I remember to this day she wrapped me in her arms and told me I am proud of you because you tried and did your best and you should be proud of yourself. I remember thinking to myself proud that I failed a class? I didn't understand then why my mom was proud, but now I understand. Even though I had failed that class I had never worked harder to understand something in my life and as such I needed to be proud of myself for trying. 

I think God is the same way that my parents always have been, he is a lover of effort. God doesn't care if we failed that class, or fall down yet again he cares that we try. My amazing dad always taught us kids that it didn't matter how many times we fall down, it matters how many times we get back up and try again. God is the same. Do you think that God cares that we sinned the same way a million times, yet we kept trying to fix the way we live our lives. God only wants us to try, try again, and keep trying until the day we finally get it. By no means does it mean that sin is ok, but if we are honestly trying that's all God cares about. So if us trying in life is all God cares about shouldn't it be enough to us? 

Like my mom wrapped her arms around me when I felt like a complete failure God wants to do likewise. His love is unconditionally there no matter how far we are from him he just wants to bless us his children. He wants us to try, to work at those things we are struggling with. God doesn't care if we are like my brother and is addicted to drugs, or something else. God doesn't care if we have broken the law, although it's not something I would recommend as it will follow you and close many doors. God only cares that we are trying every day to do better, to be better. The laws God has aren't for him, it's for us. If we follow the laws God has given those are the very things that will come to bless us in our lives. The commandments are there not to control us, because remember the whole plan was agency, for us to choose how we will live our lives. God knows what will bless us and makes us happy as such he has created laws that will bring happiness if followed. 

Who is God?

 God is all loving, 

God is nonjudgmental, 

God is always working on us,

God is all understanding, 

God is all compassionate, 

God is a peacemaker, 

God stands for what is right and true, 

God is one who endured all things, 

God is a true friend, 

God has sacrificed all things even his life due to the love he has for us, 

May we never forget who and what God has done for each one of us.

Get outside of ourselves and serve

 The two great commandments involve love. Loving God and our neighbors around us. They go hand in hand and I would include loving ourselves. It starts with loving the amazing person that we are. We all make mistakes, things we wish we could go back and redo. We are still children of God who has the power to change to become like God and such will become a God or goddess one day. Isn't that amazing when we think about it? One day in the past our heavenly parents were living a life just like we are now. They progressed just like we do until the day they became prefect and our heavenly parents. Isn't that our goal to become like them? 

If that is our goal and we have learned to love the amazing person we are today including the things we are striving to work on than it becomes easier, even natural to love God. When we truly love God we change from the inside out. Our goals become how can I bless the lives of those around me? How can I show love, compassion, and understanding. When we change we truly love God and as such we love our neighbors because our thoughts turn to how can I honor my father. So the two great commandments go hand in hand. May we find ways to be a blessing in the lives of those we may not understand or even have hurt us? It isn't always easy, but I promise blessings that we can not imagine now. Don't give up on yourself or others because we never know when a person can or will change. 

God's intent is to bring us home to him

 If you have not you should read the conference talk called God's intent is to bring you home from this past April conference. I got a lot of my blog from his talk. He talks about an experience he had on a business trip he had one time. On this trip he was on in his hotel room looking out of the window and saw an officer who had put a road block to prevent people from taking this road. The officer would direct people to another route and seemed to take pleasure out of the drivers who wanted to go through the road block. 

Our father in heaven is different from this officer who took pleasure out of telling people to go another route. Our father in heaven wants all of his children to come back to live with him after this life. As such he's given every tool we could ever need in order to come back home. He's given us prophets, scriptures, the savior, priesthood power, Temple's, churches and wards. He has given us so much because his work and glory is to bring us home to him. God wants to bless us with all he has. Isn't it amazing that we have a father who wants us. Who loves us and will never give up on us? 

No matter how far he needs to reach in order to save us is as far as he will reach. He will never care what we have done, how many times we have failed to do what is right. He will never care how many times we have left him. All heavenly father wants is for us to return to him, the faster the better. Don't beat yourself for failing because everyone will at one point or another, but be proud of yourself that you are trying to come back. If God is proud of you and all of the work you are doing then be proud of yourself. 

If you away from the path come back. Not for me, not for a family member, a friend, or even God, but for yourself. The longer you are away the more blessings that are passing you by. As soon as you return God rejoices, he will never say I will bless you in a year from now because you came back. His blessings are right away when we make the decision to come back, sometimes even starting the work to come back will bring blessings into our lives. Don't give up and show mercy to yourself. Remember God's work and glory is you! 

Finding joy in who we are

 We are all beloved children of God who has more worth, power, and possibilities than we can now imagine. We have heavenly parents who love us more than we can ever imagine who sees who we will become. If they will never give up on us and who love us so unconditionally, doesn't that mean we should feel the same way about ourselves? 

For years I honestly felt like my life didn't matter. I didn't matter. Nobody would ever miss me if I was gone in fact I felt like I would be everyone a favor if I was no longer a burden on those I loved the most. During this time I had many suicidal thoughts and attempts. The pain I felt from my depression was more than I ever thought a person could go through. I was also very sick during this time and just wanted to have life end due to everything. The way I felt about myself I now know came from Satan as we are told to judge by the fruit of it comes from God or not. 

It wasn't until I got divorced for the second time in my life that I would spend hours on my knees talking to my father in heaven. I asked him to please show me how he honestly felt about me. What happened still shocks me at times. It was gradual and didn't happen overnight, but in a years time I have come to understand the truth of how God feels about not only me, but each one of his children. We are his children those are not just words or a song we sing in primary, but are in fact truth. As such it means that if we make the right choices now and into the eternities we have the power to become just like our heavenly parents, we have the possibilities to become a God. How amazing is that? Each one of us have the power to change today to become like our heavenly parents and to have all that they have. 

When we come to realize and understand that truth for ourselves everything changes. We start to love the amazing person we are today. When hard things come into our lives it becomes easier to handle and overcome. We learn to forgive ourselves as well as others. We start to find hope, happiness, and joy in the life we are currently living. We start to see a brighter future ahead of us than we can ever imagine. We start serving others more and finding the joy in serving. We start to understand the truth and meaning of love and life. We start to live the life God always wanted for us. 

If you are struggling with seeing happiness, joy, or just loving yourself please do me a favor and pray for God to help you see you the way God sees you. As you do so I know that you will start to see your life start to change for the better. It may not happen all at once and it might be a long process but don't lose hope that you will start to see the power and beauty that you are to God because it will happen in God's timing not our own. Be patient and hopeful and it will happen. Never forget the worth you have as a child of God! 

Be a lover of learning

 I saw a quote today that said" develope a love for learning, because if you do you will never stop growing." How true this statement is. Two people can go through the same thing and the one who has a learning or growth mindset will be the one who gets through better. They will be thinking how can I learn and become a better person because of this whereas the person who simply complains about what they are going through will be the person who gets stuck no matter how much time goes by. The person who has more of a growth mindset might for a time struggle and ask themselves why did this happen. They may even complain or vent for a bit but they gain the strength they need to move on and many times make something beautiful out of the hardship they just endured. 

I have been both in my life the one who stays stuck, now I'm in the process of becoming the person who asks what can I learn from this trail to become a better person. I can say that becoming the person who tries to stay in a growth mindset helps be able to not only stay positive but also allow yourself to grow from the trail. It doesn't mean that as trails come up that I jump right away to what I can learn but I'm becoming quicker at getting there. When I lived the other way it made me stuck in a depression that I couldn't get out of because of things that had happened to me. When we get stuck it doesn't just hurt us it ends up hurting everyone who dares to get close to us. The way I have been able to change is by asking the Lord for help, but also looking at myself to see ways I can change for the better. So if you are stuck don't beat yourself up because that will only make the situation worse, but do pray for help to get to the growth mindset that will help you in life. 

Labor day " the work we need to do"

 As today is labor day I want us to think about the work we do each day. We all do different things, yet they are all important in this world. What do you do? Are you working in the health business? Are you a parent? A student? A teacher? A writer? How is it that although we all do different things in our lives they are all united? How do they point to the savior and how can we use the Lord more in what we do? The answers are going to be different for each person, but take a minute to remember the savior in all that we do. After all isn't the savior the one who helped us get here in the first place? 

Also let's take a minute to think about God's work. His work and glory is to bring about our salvation and eternal life which will lead to our happiness in this life and into the eternities. If you have not you should read the conference talk called is the plan working? In the talk Adrian Ochoa says " I testify that the plan of happiness works. It was created by your Heavenly Father, who loves you." "Felt to sing the song of redeeming love” but do not “feel so now.” This world is so hard with so many things that we go through that I know I have wondered many times how is this part of God's plan for me? How can this ever bring happiness into my life. At times I do complain and vent to God. I have learned that even the hardest things I have ever gone through have brought happiness into my life. Sometimes it takes time for the trail to become a blessing, but I promise God's plan will always be better than we ever imagined for ourselves. 

Perhaps we feel the way Jesus’s disciples felt when they were in a ship “in the midst of the sea, tossed with waves: for the wind was contrary.” Then, very early in the morning: “Jesus went unto them, walking on the sea. “And when the disciples saw him walking on the sea, they were troubled, … and they cried out for fear. “But straightway Jesus spake unto them, saying, Be of good cheer; it is I; be not afraid. “And Peter answered him and said, Lord, if it be thou, bid me come unto thee on the water. “And he said, Come. And when Peter was come down out of the ship, he walked on the water, to go to Jesus. “But when he saw the wind boisterous, he was afraid; and beginning to sink, he cried, … Lord, save me. “And immediately Jesus stretched forth his hand, and caught him, and said unto him, O thou of little faith, wherefore didst thou doubt?” If you are feeling this way now or have in the past I promise that God's work and glory is to bring hope, light, life, and happiness into our lives, but sometimes we need to trust God and have faith first. If something is taking time remember it doesn't mean it won't happen, just be patient. 

As we do the Lord's work in our own lives not only will be come to happiness, but so will those we love. Don't give up hope! When you are struggling get outside of yourself and serve just like the savior did and happiness will with time will come into your life. 

My testimony to the world

 I know that Christ came into this world for you and me. He lived a perfect life so he could do the atonement. Our heavenly parents love us for no other reason then we are their children. We have more worth and power in ourselves than we can imagine. We came to this world to see how much good we can do. When we are struggling we need to serve more than any other time in our lives, and as we do we will feel the Savior's love and power to make it easier to get though what we are going through. Joseph Smith restored the Lord's church in these last days and gave his life for it so did his brother. The book of Mormon goes hand in hand with the Bible and they both testify of the savior. We have a modern day prophet who speaks to us today in behalf of God. If we listen to the prophet we will be where we can gain strength to get though this life. If we are prepared we have no need to worry as all things will bring about blessings that we need and yes that includes trails that sometimes break us. We need to be polished just like a diamond is in order to become God and goddesses ourselves. My hope is that this month we will see the power, beauty, and strength that we all have as children of God. If you are struggling with your testimony right now or your barely hanging on I pray that you go to God for the help you need. 

Being intentional

 I had a friend of mine send me this quote from uchtdolf "discipleship is not about doing things perfectly; it’s about doing things intentionally." This means a few things first, we should know why we are doing what we are. Don't just go with the flow or what is easier, go with what you honestly believe. Second, know why do you believe or not believe something. Be able to defend the faith. I personally love being able to hear another person who can defend what they believe, especially if it's different than what I believe. I see so many people who just go with the flow instead of asking what they believe and following through with their believes. 

We are to be Christ's church so what does that mean? First, we need to be examples in all that we do. We don't need to be perfect, but we should be asking ourselves if others knew that I was a member what would they believe the church taught? Would they know that God teaches to be loving, understanding, compassionate, service minded, leaders in our communities? Are we forgiving of others and ourselves? If we are not doing these things how can we become more intentional in what we do and say? How can we be more Christlike towards those around us so they may realize that there's something different in a good way and want to know what that difference is? Are we always striving to be the best friend, family member, and neighbor that we can be? In what ways can we improve. I challenge you to ask yourself these questions to become a better disciple of God's, after all that we have comes from God. 

Hard times allow us to become the best version of ourselves!

 I have been thinking lately on the savior. He never had an easy life so if we want to become like him then how can we expect to do so? The savior was born in a barn because there wasn't room in the inn for the savior. He lived in a desert. There was little to no water and so he would have lived his life working on finding water each day. He worked with his hands each day. Heavenly father depended on him to be perfect and always do the right thing no matter how hard it was to do so. He was expected to put everyone ahead of himself. He was expected to learn everything from God to help those around him. He had to leave his professional life in order to do the will of heavenly parents. He had to teach others to lead the church when he would no longer be here to do so. He performed miracles every day of his life and yet people still hated him. He starved himself in order to teach us how to give all things to the Lord. He bled from every pore of his body in love of each one of us. He died on the cross so we could all be risen again one day. In the final hour of his life even heavenly father turned his back on him so he could finish the atonement. Yet while he was on the cross he taught us how to forgive. So the next time we want to complain about we are going through, hopefully we will remember that if the greatest man who ever lived on earth had to go through so much in order to become the savior may we remember that we will have to go through our own trails to become the best version of ourselves. It will never be easy, but we have something Christ didn't have, we will never have to face anything alone so long as we allow Christ to help us he will. 

Everyone is God's children

 I had a very interesting conversation with one of God's sons tonight. Not only did it feel like I was talking to my brother who I miss horribly every day of my life, but I could tell that this son needed to hear what I had to say. I felt like we all need to be reminded of this from time to time so we don't forget or to come to understand the truth more clearly. 

We are all God's children, I don't care how far you are from living the gospel. I don't care if you are straight, gay, or whatever you are still a child of God who deserves to be loved and accepted. We can accept people as they are without agreeing with them on everything. I mean even some of my closest friends I don't agree with 100 percent of the time, but it doesn't stop me from loving them. So if you are judging those around you instead of loving them please stop. We all need to be reminded of our worth, because even the strongest of us struggle with life at times. 

If you have gone off the covenants path and feel like you are failing or are so gone that you can't come back know a few things. First, you are a child of God who has more worth and power than you can ever imagine! Second, it doesn't matter what you have done in the past, because we all have sinned. God says that church is a hospital and if that's true then that means not a single person who goes is perfect. Third, the savior has already taken care of anything we may have done in the past. It doesn't mean go and sin, but it does mean there's a way back for everyone who wants to come back. Please realize we need everyone at church, I don't care if you are living the gospel or if you are living a life that is hurting yourself as well as others. After all coming to Christ is the best way to live a good life that you can be proud of. Lastly please as this has been brought up by a few people I know who says that they feel like members are judgemental please remember to reach out, to love, to accept and like I said accepting a person doesn't mean that you agree with them. Even if you disagree with their lifestyle there's no reason to be a hater and say things that will hurt another. 

What do you believe?

 In my philosophy class, the other day we discussed if we believe in God, why, or why not? We aso discussed the fact that there's three different types of people. The first, theist believe in a god in some form. Second, you have atheist who believe that God does not exist. Finally, you have agnostic who believe that they don't have enough knowledge to support either way so they lean towards God doesn't exist, but you give them more knowledge and they would change their minds. 

In theist there's so many ways to believe in God. Do you believe that he is an active part in our lives? That God not only hears prayers, but answers them? If God answers prayers does he preform miracles in our lives that there's no other way to explain but to say God did this and did it for me? You have to ask yourself these questions and then go to the right sources for the answers to some of life's hardest questions. 

For myself I have asked these questions and many others. As I have searched for the answers to the questions I have what I have found is my testimony is strengthed. Answers don't come overnight at least didn't for me, but with time and working on the the answers and getting to know God they did come. So if you are struggling right now with your testimony it's ok because for me it took leaving the church for a while. Having periods when I would be active and then be inactive. So many prayers and searching the scriptures and conference talks that I finally found my testimony. If you are struggling with a child, siblings, friends, or parents leaving the church don't lose hope for their return in this life or the next. God wants to bless each of us, but many of his blessings only come from living the gospel. I have found hope and a light for my life. I have found that there's a future ahead of me that I'm only beginning to see. 

My testimony is that I know, not believe, but know that I have heavenly parents who love me even more than my earthly parents do. That I have a divine worth and future ahead of me that I'm only beginning to see. I have power that comes from living the covenants I have made with my father in heaven. The more I see myself clearly the more my heart goes out to those around me, because I start to see them the way God sees them. I know that Joseph went to the grove to pray to God to know which church to join. He was told none of them as they only had a portion of the truth and that Joseph would be the one who would restore all of the truth to the earth. God has told us to pray, work for, and expect miracles in our lives. As I have headed the prophets I have been blessed ten fold. I know that as God removes something in our lives what he's really doing is making room for something even better. I know that even having the desire to want to believe is so important and has more power than we can imagine. My testimony comes from my own experiences, prayers that have been answered, questions that I did the work and went to the right sources to know for myself. We are a church of questions that bring about revelation so if you don't know if the church is true or you have questions I challenge you to pray about it then go read scriptures and conference talks. I know if you will do these things that you will come to know yourself. 

If you are struggling because a loved one has left I would say continue to pray for them. Love them as they are now. Pray for things to change in their lives. Don't lose hope because we know that God has said that heaven will be more glorious than we can imagine. Last of all, remember God loves them even more than you ever can so leave it in his loving hands. 

What does knowledge really mean to you?

I always thought that learning always looked the same. That either you learned or you failed. Today in philosophy I learned that knowledge is always different, because you can have ten people in the same class and each person will learn something different. The more effort we put into learning and becoming our best self the more we will get out of our lives. The more we truly forgive and forget the more people who will forgive you. The more you serve others and forget about yourself the more friendships you will form. When it's you who is struggling more people will be there for you usually. When you brighten another person's life the more your own life will be brighter. It doesn't always work this way but I would say more times than not it will. So if you are struggling or wondering how you can have a better life get outside of yourself, look for the small things to be grateful for, the small victories in your life, and strengthen the friendships you have in your life. I promise as you do so you will find that your life gets better! 

Show ourselves grace and forgiveness

 In a world that teaches us that we are never enough may we learn instead to show ourselves grace. Maybe we are not perfect, but that's ok so long as we are doing our best. Life is hard enough don't make it any harder than it needs to be. Forgive yourself for your short comings. It's truly part of seeing the worth we have as children of God! We are enough to God just the way we are, so that should mean we are enough to ourselves as well. 

Ways to show love to God!

 I show my love by serving his children, 

I show my love by standing up for what I believe, 

I show my love by going to the temple as often as I can, 

I show my love by using my talents and gifts to bring others to Christ, 

I show my love by forgiving all things and giving them to God, 

I show my love by going to school so I can bring healing to his children, 

I show my love by giving myself grace as I learn to be better each day, 

I show my love to God in all that I do each day, 

How do you show your love to the one who will never leave your side? 

Growth is uncomfortable, but necessary

 When we get out of our comfort zone that's usually when we grow the most. When we grow in our faith in challenging times that's when our knowledge increases. As our faith and knowledge increase that is often times how we get closer to God. As we get closer to God we will start to see ourselves and others in a more compassionate way. As we start to be more compassionate we start to serve more. As we serve more the happier we become. It's a cycle that is always repeating itself, but it starts with being uncomfortable or by going through a hard time. 

Get outside of our comfort zone

 "You can't discover new oceans unless you have the courage to lose sight of the shore" author unknown. I take this quote to mean we are going to find new growth, new places, or new people unless we go outside of our comfort zone. Of course it's hard to do so, because it's going outside of what we know. It's not impossible, and what we gain by doing so is more amazing than we can ever imagine! 

This past year I have gone out of my comfort zone in almost every way. I have gotten a new job, moved to a new state, gotten a new car, a new phone, and started a journey in my education. So what have I gained as I have gotten out of my comfort in every possible way? I have gained a new me who is more confident. A person who has learned that even if something feels impossible right now, it doesn't mean it is. Sometimes what we need to do is get on our knees to ask for his help in whatever we are struggling with. So I challenge you to get out of your comfort zone to go after the things you have always wanted. 

Acting on faith!

 It's been an interesting journey though school so far. Yesterday I was in my philosophy class we got talking about how most things we think we know has no hard facts to it and is based on faith. After all how do we know something and most things is because somebody told us no matter if it was by written word or spoken word. You look at history and nobody ever met these historical people, nobody who lives now lived during the events from history so it's not a hard fact it's based on the words of the past which many times is an opinion and not unbiased so we can't know for sure. The knowledge that we have is on faith. Faith that the sources are true. 

The discussion got me thinking about the questions that were asked to form the church of Jesus Christ of latter-day saints. How do we really know that Joseph went to the grove to ask God? How do we know that God appeared to Joseph? How do we know the book of Mormon is true? How do we even know that there's a God? How do we know that God loves us? How do we know that we are his child and as such he loves us? I never realized just how much we are a church of not only questions but of faith. It's our faith in God that will never fall even if everything else does. We need faith in order to live the gospel. We need faith in order to know things not only in the church but any knowledge requires faith. 

There's truly hardly anything that is 100 percent fact. Even our parentage there's no prove other than what our parents tell us. Then we exercise faith and trust in our parents to believe that they are our parents. Even DNA is not 100 percent fact, it's close to it but not a hard fact. So everything we think we know is based on faith. Yet we know that God is a hard fact and he knows everything. It's such comfort to know that I don't have to trust in what I have been told because I can ask God and he will reveal the truth to me. I never realized just how much of a comfort that really is until class yesterday. I have a feeling that I am going to be questioning things I never would have if not for this class. So I challenge you to ask God the questions you have and then exercise faith in God that he not only will lead you to answers but as he does your knowledge will increase. I can't wait to see the person I am after this semester because I have a feeling that I'm not going to be the same person and that makes me so excited for this journey to more revelation. An opportunity to increase my faith and trust in God. 

Follow your dreams!

 For years I have thought about going back to school to become a therapist, but I kept on telling myself all of the reasons why I couldn't. As long as I continued to tell myself such I was right. When I started to see myself the way the Lord did it made me realize that I was more powerful than I thought I was and that meant that I could do most things in this life with the right attitude. The more I prayed to know what the Lord saw in me the more I realized just how amazing I really was and how many things I could do. I may only be in my first semester of school but I know that no matter how hard it becomes I can do it, because I am not doing it on my own. I have the power that comes from prayer. So if you have a dream that you want to do I promise you can accomplish it with the help of God no matter how many things are in your way. After all if my sister who has small children, a full time job, a house can find the time to go to school I know that anyone can find the time to go after their own dreams. I'm not saying it will be easy, but I am saying that with God's help anything is possible. After all impossible spells I'm possible with the Lord's help. 

In my psychology class yesterday my professor put up a quote that has gotten me thinking since. "There's no secret to success, it's the result of preparation, hard work, and learning from failures" general Colin Powell said such. Just like there was a lot of things I had to do just to start school no matter what we want or our dreams might be there's usually prep work we have to do. Then we have to work hard as if everything was on us and pray like everything was on God as we do such we will find the strength to do what we need to do so that our dreams can become a reality. We have to learn from our failures or I would put it the times it hadn't gone well. If we learn from our failures they were never failures, but stepping stones to what we want to be in life. 

My challenge today is figure out what you want to be in life then make it a reality. Anything worth anything won't be easy, but with the help of God it will be possible. So don't tell yourself that it will never be because that thought will stop you and hold you back instead ask yourself what needs to happen to make my dreams a reality. If my sister can make her dreams happen I know that anyone can it just make you work harder than most but never give up hope for a brighter future and what you want it to look like. Don't give up and if you need a push or extra support know that I am happy to help in anyway I can. May the Lord bless us in our paths and may our paths lead us to be closer to God. 

The Lord wants to bless us!

 There's sunshine in my soul today, 

There's healing in my soul today, 

There's understanding in my soul today, 

There's peace in my soul today, 

There's pure joy in my soul today, 

There's hope in my soul today, 

There's second chances in my life today, 

These things come from putting the savior in the center of our lives,

These things will be given to you so long as you put the savior in the center of your life, 

In the middle of trails we will find these things because the savior wants to give these things to you but are you going to take them? 

The choice will and always has been yours to take, 

The savior is begging you to allow him to bless you, 

May not happen overnight, but I promise as you center your life on the savior it will happen just give it time. 

Everything goes back to primary answers

 What are primary answers? Reading our scriptures, going to church, pretaking the sacrament, going to the temple. These things may be so small but they keep building into great things. May we take a minute to see if we are doing these small things and if not may we do better each day. These things may seem small and we may feel like we don't have time in our busy lives but I promise that as you make time to do these we will build a foundation that will last no matter the storms that may come into our lives. The savior needs to be the center of our lives when he becomes the center we are given peace, healing, and happiness that we otherwise wouldn't have. 

Life is hard but beautiful!

 I have come to realize that life has many ups and downs, twists and turns, heartbreak but love, joy but sadness, beauty but ugliness. I have come to understand that what we see is what our world becomes. We don't get many things we want but we will always get what we need. So how do we see beauty in the asses of our lives? 

Are we always trying to look for the positive, lessons, ways we can uplift others, the beauty that God has created? Or are we stuck in a mindset that only sees the negative, trails we are facing, the ways that God not being in our lives, the ugliness? Whatever we put our focus and faith is what we will find. Being positive doesn't mean that you don't break for a time or question why me God because in the middle of a trail that is all we are going to see. But how long do we stay there? How long before we start believing that maybe even in this hard time there's still beauty all around us. God never left us to struggle on our own in fact when we place our faith in him he will carry us during those times we just can't. 

I promise there's hope, light, and beauty no matter how dark it seems now. Don't forget that life is hard but it's so beautiful as we turn our lives to God. No matter how dark it seems now there's joy that will come. If we allow the hard times to bring hope, light, blessings, and a beauty that God will those trying times to help us become more beautiful than we can ever imagine. Don't lose hope please no matter how dark today is. 

Moving forward

 Today I was thinking as I was talking to a advisor at my school to sign up for classes that would start on Monday. I realized that the only thing that matters is what happens today and going forward so my future. That God has given me this second chance at my life and I am the one who gets to determine what it looks like. 

I could take all of the crap that has happened in my past and keep holding onto them or learn from them and be grateful for the person it's made me. As I start a new chapter in my life I know that the blessings that comes from letting go is more amazing than anything the Lord could give me. I have struggled with my health but now I am healthy what a blessing. I have gone through so many break-ups but each time I come back stronger than before. I have power that I wouldn't have if not for the things I have gone through how amazing! I am so grateful for this opportunity to go to school to become even more successful and get ahead in life. 

So if you are feeling stuck right now look at how you are treating yourself and your past. Are you holding yourself back because you can't or won't forgive and let the past go? Are you turning towards God instead of turning bitter and angry? Are you able to look at the past hard times to be grateful for the person and lessons you learned? I promise as you forgive and let go blessings will come that you never would have imagined possible. After all God wants us what is best for us. All things are for our good even they might have destroyed us for a time. Remember that God won't take away your agency or the agency of another and trails may come into our lives because of it but as we learn to forgive we will gain strength, courage, and power into our lives to bless us. 

Blessings that comes from serving

 I have found that the blessings that come from getting outside of ourselves to serve those around us far out weigh the sacrifice that is required to do so. It goes against our very nature to serve others when we are struggling ourselves, yet there's a reason why both of the great commandments talk about love. Love requires effort, sacrifice, and thinking about the other ahead of yourself, and going against the natural man that is inside of each of us. 

I didn't start to learn this lesson on how to truly love others until almost two years ago when I was called to be the compassionate service leader in my ward while I was very sick and was in the process of figuring out why I kept passing out. I was determined that every sister in the ward would know that I loved them and I would get to know the needs that each sister had so I got to work. I to this day don't know if the service i gave and the visits and texts I made a difference in the lives I was trying to serve but it made a difference in mine. 

I was given power that I know came because I was forcing myself to get outside of myself and serve. Somehow I was able to keep going to work which is a miracle in itself when I think about everything that was going on. I was finally led to the right doctor who though many tests, time on his part, and a determination that he was going to get to the bottom of things found the answer to what was going on. He found that I had 15 tumors in my ovaries and at least half were cancerous. But because of them finding the cancer so early on I was fine after they were removed and I healed from the infection that happened due to the surgery. I was finally healthy after years of struggles with my health. As my hormones got stable my depression started to get better. Somehow God blessed me because I was focused on his children at a time that I was struggling so much myself. I know that God will bless us as we serve his children around us. So if you are struggling get outside of yourself and serve someone else I promise you will be helping yourself in the process every time. 

Faith is an action word

 Faith requires effort, but it is also the very thing that will move the mountains in our lives no matter how large they are. Faith is how miracles come, even though miracles may not happen in the timing we want or the way we expect. Faith is trusting the Lord even when we don't know how they will happen. Faith requires patience. Faith is an action word meaning we are doing something. Faith even as small as a seed can grow to become as big as a tree with care and action. 

I have come to realize that faith in my savior has been how I have been able to forgive and give things to the Lord to do with it as he seems fit. Faith is how I have gotten through such darkness and suicidal thoughts to become hopeful for a brighter future ahead of me. My faith is how I got though a brain tumor, throwing up everyday for three years, it's how I got though finding out that I had cancer. My faith is how I became pregnant when I was told I never would and I know that it will be my faith that will bring a healthy child into this world although it will take many miracles for it to happen. It's my faith that tells me that I can do well in school to become successful even though school has always been challenging for me. Its faith that tells me that God is a god of promises and miracles so if he promises us something it will happen in his timing. 

So next time you start to doubt the faith you have in the savior or in the gospel please take a minute to doubt your doubts. Satan knows what is in store for us and how to stop us from the things God has in store for us. So we have to use the faith that we have no matter how small to fight the doubts Satan will put into our lives to get us off track. But I promise that as you conquer your doubts with your faith that you have that blessings will come into your life that you never could have imagined. So if you are struggling please get on your knees to pray for strength, faith, and courage to continue on the path. If you have questions great go to the scriptures and conference talks to get your answers to the things you are wondering. After all we are a church of questions and they need to continue so that revelation will continue. There is nothing wrong about questions just do the work to get the answers you stand in need of. Go to the right sources for the answer you are seeking and I promise you that your faith will continue to grow. 

A higher joy and law

 If you have not yet read a higher joy from this past conference from Uchtdorf. His talk is where I get my blog from and is an amazing read that can help us in our lives. 

He talks about the wright brothers invented flying and the joys from going higher. There's everlasting joy and happiness that can come into our lives by living the gospel even the higher law. Many feel like the gospel is too hard to live with too many laws that are hard to live. After all why do we need to pay a tenth of what we own when the church doesn't need it? Why do we need to serve in the church after all most churches pay people who serve in the church why not ours? Why should we go and do missionary work? Why do hard things happen to those who live the gospel to the fullest? Why should we spend time in the temple? Why forgive and give things to the Lord? Why should we always be modest when it's so hot or hard to find things that are modest? Why the word of wisdom? Why so many rules and how can they bring joy and happiness into our lives? 

I have come to understand that all of the rules God has given to us all bring us to two things that are centered on love. Either we have the rules so we can show love to God and his children around us. Or the second reason is because God loves us and wants to protect us from being hurt. When we learn that every law or rule God has comes from love it will help us see those things in a way that makes it easier to follow. He is not a controlling God he has given us our agency as such it's our choice to follow God. But he does love us and knows what will be for our benefit so may we learn to see things in a different way to not only make it easier to follow but also brings blessings that we can never imagine. 

Flying was risky in those early days. The brothers knew this. And so did their father, Milton. In fact, he was so terrified of losing both of his sons in a flying accident that they promised him they would never fly together. And they never did—with one exception. Seven years after that historic day at Kitty Hawk, Milton Wright finally gave his consent and watched as Wilbur and Orville flew together for the first time. After landing, Orville convinced his father to take his first and only flight and to see for himself what it was like. As the plane lifted from the ground, the 82-year-old Milton got so caught up in the exhilaration of flight that all fear left him. Orville rejoiced as his father shouted with delight, “Higher, Orville, higher!”

Just as there was joy in flying higher I promise there's joy in living the gospel or the higher law. Not just by being a Sunday Mormon because they are not living the gospel but for those who honestly do their best to live the gospel. We are given comfort in times that would otherwise break us. Hope in times where we feel are hopeless. Joy that all things are for our good especially when we might not see it with our mortal eyes at the moment. Eternal joy that will never be taken no matter how unfair life might be. God wants to bless us with joy and happiness that we can never describe or imagine but are we willing to give all things to him? To realize that as we are given things that break us that seems so unfair that we can trust that he knows what will bring us to a higher, holier, happier place in life now and into the eternities. 

Thank you God

 This is a poem that I made while I was in sacrament meeting today during a musical number. I hope you can feel the spirit that I felt as I share. This is my first poem I have ever wrote. 

O Lord, thank you for getting me though tough waters, 

Thank you for never giving up on me even when I gave up on myself, 

Thank you for the gift of the atonement, even forgiving me when I have wronged, 

Thank you for helping me forgive hard things to bring healing and peace, 

Thank you for second Chances even when I might not deserve it, 

Thank you for hope in the midst of darkness,

Thank you for prayer and the power that comes from it, 

Thank you for temples that I can obtain blessings that never end,

Thank you for hard times that made me cry that I might be polished and a better person, 

Thank you for bad times that I might appreciate when good times come,

Thank you for giving me gifts and talents that I might bless your children, 

Thank you for giving me lessons that I might become like you, 

Thank you for all that you have given me to show the love that you have for me and those around me, 

May I never stop being grateful for all that you have given to me, I love you! 

We can do hard things

 I went to the temple today to pray about a trail that only a select few know about. I am in a waiting period of my life and it has been hard. There are times I don't understand how or why this thing is the will of the Lord but I know it is. 

As I went to the temple to pray about this trail this thought came into my mind that there's hope even in hard times. There's hope in the savior. Hope in a bright future because of the temple and the covenants we can make in there. Hope that no matter what happens in this life one day it will be made right. Hope in the trails no matter how hard they might seem today. 

The savior has nor never will abandon us and so long as we have him we can do all things. I look at the pioneers and all they went through. Why would a loving father have them go through so much? What did they learn? Their faith became unstoppable. They saw miracles happen when all things seemed lost. They learned how to help those around them even when they were struggling. The Lord strength came into not only their lives but in the church and all those who would come into the kingdom. We still to this day gain faith, courage, and strength from them. 

Why did Joseph of Egypt have to be taken away from his family and sold into slavery? All he had done is tell his brothers a dream he had, what was wrong with being honest? As we are told Joseph was put into a situation though many trails to save not only Egypt but many people from starving. He was taken from his family so that at a later date he could save them. Joseph was so successful even as a slave that he became second in command with the Savior's help and power. The Lord had a larger picture than Joseph could have ever had imagined. If our father saw the bigger picture with Joseph why not with the trails we go through? I promise just like God never left Joseph he will never leave us to go through our trails alone so long as we do what we need to. 

Think eternal

 As we learn to think eternal even our trying times become for our good. We learn that the things that truly matter are the things that will last forever. Our families, knowledge, our faith, and the memories we are able to make. We learn that our trails are given to us because God wants to polish us and he trusts us enough to go through those things to become a brighter and better person. So let's learn what truly matters because the world is often wrong. We have the power to make this world such a better place for everyone as we focus on those things that are eternal. 

God's blessings come

 For over the past year I had been praying that Alex and his family could also heal. That I wouldn't lose such great people in my life. That I might understand why it was in God's will that I had to experience another divorce. I asked for the courage to start following my dreams. To see myself the way God sees me. 

It took a year and more tears than I care to admit. It has been the hardest two years of my life. Yet I am starting to see miracles that I never imagined would come into my life. Alex and his are healing and coming to terms with such a hard trail that came into all of our lives. I have gained Alex back in my life as such a great friend who has helped me believe in my dreams. He's agreed to help me with a few things that I am working on. I am still trying to understand why there can be two great people who are not meant to be together. I have had the courage and strength to start working on things I have thought about doing since my senior year of high school. I am starting to see this amazing person who has always been there just buried under self doubt and hatred for the world around me. 

I am now praying for certain things that I know will come into my life in the right time for me. Pray does change the situations in our lives. It doesn't happen over night and at times might feel like a huge trail in our lives but I promise God's blessings and answers will come in the right time for us. So if you are in the middle of a trail don't give up and get on your knees to pray to God. He is there and he loves each of you in ways that we can't fully understand while on this earth. All things are really for our good especially the hard things in our lives. It's more than ok to feel what you feel because just because they are for our good doesn't mean that they don't hurt and make us question things about ourselves and the world around us. Don't give up hope that the blessings you seek will one day come to you. 

What we tell ourselves is what we become

 I have to realize that what I tell myself is what I become. For years I told myself that I was a failure, had nothing to offer, was a burden to those who loved me, couldn't do hard things, was a victim of so many things. So what did I become? I became a failure in everything that I tried. I had nothing to offer because I didn't use my gifts for the good of others. I became a burden because I kept holding myself back from helping those around me. I couldn't get out of bed most days to do anything productive with my days. I stopped trying the moment things became hard because I felt like I couldn't do hard things. I became a victim of the things that I had gone through. I became suicidal and depressed. I became anxious just thinking about going out of my house. So what happened when I changed what I told myself? 

When I changed my thoughts to I could do anything with the help of God. I am a survivor of many hard times and things. I am a beloved daughter of God who has devine power from God on high. I am going to go after my dreams and stop holding myself back from the things I want in life. I don't have to be anything but me because I am amazing. I make this world a better place because I'm alive. I have learned from my past to become successful in life. My failures are stepping stones to having a successful life. When I started to change the words I told myself I started to think those things. My thoughts became my actions. My actions are slowly becoming who I am as a person. 

If I can change what I told myself to stop holding myself back I know that you guys are capable of so much more than we ever could have imagined. I know that everyone is a child of God who has more worth and power than anyone can imagine. So let's stop holding ourselves back from the things we really want in life. Let's stop allowing Satan to lie to us and let's stop believing his lies. Let's instead learn to think positive and realize we shape our future by the words we tell ourselves. We are enough to God then we should be enough to ourselves. God loves us so much that he bleed from every pore and died on the cross so let's take those things to realize who we have always been. Let's change so others around us change for the positive. We really can change this world by starting to get to our full selves! Let's dare to tell ourselves and those around us positive things to shape this world to one of power and strength. 

Forgiveness is for us

 I want to share a story and a lesson I have learned the way in life. For those who don't know I have had two divorces and I reacted differently in both of them. My first husband was very abusive and controlling. I had been warned from people not to even date let alone marry. I was 19 and thought I knew everything until the night that I didn't and started looking for a way out. Miracles happened the next day to get me out and into my way back home to Utah. After the divorce I had a hard time forgiving Kenny for what he had done. I had also had a hard time forgiving myself for not listening to the people around me who was there the day everything came crushing down around me. My lack of forgiveness turned me into a bitter and angry person who ended up losing so much peace because of it. 

My second divorce just happened but this time I decided to do the hard things and forgive and seek healing for everyone involved. I turned to prayer, scriptures, and conference talks as a way to heal. What I learned and gained came because I not only forgave but I turned towards God to comfort me. It didn't happen right away and believe me there were more tears than I ever thought a person was capable of. I learned how to truly love because of the divorce. I learned God does preform miracles we never imagined possible. I learned that as we forgive our hearts turn towards God who wraps his arms around us to heal us. I'm becoming friends with my ex husband and I know that even though I know things worked out the way they needed to that miracles happened to help both of us to heal because this time I forgave and turned towards God. So do yourself a favor and forgive. Let things go and give them to God. Most of the time it's not easy to forgive when a person hurts us so much but there's power in forgiveness and God has never asked us to forgive on our own. He will be there every step of the way as we trust God and forgive. 

Get outside of ourselves

 When we are struggling we usually want to stay within ourselves and keep to our comfort zone. The only problem with that when we are struggling is the things we tend to want to do is usually the things that will hurt or numb us further. When we are struggling we need to get outside of ourselves and serve. 

When I was going through the worst year of my life I was called to be the compassionate service leader in my ward. It forced me to forget about the trails I was going through and get to work serving the sisters in my ward. As I got outside of myself two things started to happen. First I made friends with the sisters, some of which I am still friends with to this day. The second thing that happened was my trails seemed to become easier to handle. They didn't go away and they were still hard but I was given strength that I know I wouldn't have had otherwise. So if you are struggling get outside of yourself and find someone who you can serve. 

There's always hope

 After such a hard two years of my life I have had miracles come into my life that I never imagined would come. I finally have a car again and it's the nicest car I have ever owned. I'm starting school on the 19th of this month and for the first time I believe I can do school and I'm smart enough to do so. After months of praying that God would not only help me heal but help my ex husband heal we talked for the first time since everything and are going to try to stay friends. I have been able to do this blog, write my book, and start making my dreams a reality. Sometimes we have to go through our hardest times in life to get the miracles we never could have imagined. 

Today on my way to church I was paying attention to the spirit as did so I realized how many butterflies went by. To me butterflies always remind me there's hope, especially in times I honestly believe are dark without a spark of light. I realized that I had tried to do the hard things even though it was hard and doing so I had gained so many miracles the last little while. So if you are going through a hard time remember a few things first things always have a way to get worse before they get better so don't lose hope. Second your attitude is often times the only thing you have control of so pray for the Lord to help you stay positive and kind even when it's hard to do so. Third remember that things do get better so don't lose hope for the future. Fourth God gives us as many chances as we need to get things right so failures are ok so long as we are always doing better. Please don't lose hope for brighter days if you are going through a hard time right now. 

Should we be different or fit in?

 Yesterday I had to go to school to take a placement test for my college that I will be attending. Apart of the test was writing an essay about should we be unique or go with society? It got me thinking about so much. Should we just go with the flow or should we be different and stand out? 

I started to realize that we wouldn't be America without those from history and now if they hadn't dared to stand out and be different. When our founding fathers signed they didn't know if we would win or not. They had no idea how things were going to pan out. What they did know was they had no official army or government, they had little to no weapons. They were outnumbered by a lot. They were going against the most powerful country at the time. If they signed and they lost they would lose everything! They would lose their wealth, their good name, their land, they would likely be killed. So knowing what they knew why did they sign, after all it had to have been so scary knowing what they knew? They signed because in spite of everything they knew they were doing the right thing. Many times in life doing the right thing will be the hardest thing we could ever do, but it's still right. As we do what is right God will bless us. After all God did bless our struggling country because of our founding fathers. They did win and God prepared a country and people who would restore the gospel. 

What would have happened if Rosa Parks hadn't refused to get up for a white person to sit? It was law for those who were colored to give up their seats to those who were white. Laws were not fair or equal in her day. Society was very wrong but she made a choice that landed her in jail. Why did she do it knowing that it was law? Was it that she was lazy or was there something more at play? I honestly believe that she was standing up for herself and those who were thought as less in society. Martin Luther King Jr taught to stand up but do it in a peaceful manner. His speach I have a dream has gone down in history because in a day and society that he was viewed as less he stood up in a peaceful manner. He never got mean even though he was treated as trash instead what he wanted was peace and fairness for everyone. May we stand up for what we believe no matter how hard it might be to do so. May we be leaders in our communities. May we never be ashamed to be ourselves and to bring hope and the savior in such a dark world.