I hope you dance

 As Christmas drawers closer I have been thinking about this year. How hard and amazing it’s been. How much I have overcome to become this amazing person that I am today. I have been thinking about everything I have been blessed with. How I can use my gifts and talents to bless the lives of those I love.

This is the week of finals so I have been thinking about who I was at the beginning of the semester and who I am at the end. At the beginning of the semester, I was struggling with understanding my purpose in life. Who am I and what value does my life have? I felt so alone and honestly was struggling with getting in the grove of being back at school after more than a decade of being out. By the middle of the semester, I wanted to drop out of school and honestly felt like I was failing so why continue? At the middle of the semester, I had my first at fault accident that totaled my car so that was hard to deal with not having a car again as well. At the beginning of the semester, I was single and wanted to leave Texas to move back to Utah where I felt like home was.

At the end of the semester, I look back and I am so grateful for this opportunity I have had to be able to go back to school. I am so grateful that my boyfriend talked me into staying in school and following my dreams in life. I am so grateful that I have learned who I am this semester. I am a daughter of God who has more possibilities that I never imagined possible. I have this drive and motivation to help those around me in all areas of my life. I have been able to see that I never failed instead I was becoming a strong, faithful, and determined person all my life. God had never left me, and he never will so long as I don’t leave his side. I am grateful that I learned to ask for help when in need instead of trying to do it on my own, because there will always be people who want to help. If you don’t ask for help, then you will stay stuck and you will fail because nobody can do everything on their own. We all stand in need of help from time to time. At the same time do what you can on your own. Believe in yourself and that you can do hard things. At the end of the semester, I am not alone anymore. I am beginning to see a future in which I can finally have roots planted again in my life. I don’t see myself leaving Texas anymore. I see a future in which the pain from the past no longer must hold me back instead it can be building blocks towards a great life. I am falling more in love by the day and I’m so grateful to a loving father who has always been leading my life towards this day.

Yesterday was my last day in my favorite class of the semester, my psychology class. In class she played “I Hope You Dance.” She talked about how when she was in her first year of her master’s program she wanted to drop out until she heard this song. She was also feeling suicidal and much of the way I felt most of this semester. When she heard this song, it reminded her that she had to dance her way though her masters and she could if she made the choice to do so no matter how hard it got. To never take a breath for granted. It was soon after this that things in her life started to get better and she did finish her masters.

Learn to set your dreams and goals high. Learn to Dream. Believe in yourself. Remember whose you are. You are a child of God’s. You will become a God or Goddess one day. Do we really understand this? Do we understand why we are here? Do we understand that it’s in the trying times that we become the best version of ourselves? Do we understand that trails are needed in order for our eternal happiness? Do we understand that God wants us to be happy?

Don’t ever settle in life in any area. Don’t take a single day for granted. Learn to dance and never give up no matter how hard it becomes. After all, my sweet mother always taught me that anything worth anything will be hard. So, if something is hard look at what is this teaching and at the end of the day will this help us learn to become a God or Goddess. We all make a difference in this world for good or bad so what are you going to choose today?

Happiness is a choice we must all make. Although sometimes it’s the hardest choice we will ever make. Happiness, I have learned is having gratitude. You can have depression like I suffer from and still be happy. How is this possible? Our happiness and joy need to come from the savior. Only he can help us make the choice to be happy despite the trails and hardships we deal with in this life. Happiness is a choice we make each day, sometimes a choice we make by the minute. Happiness is not having a perfect life or not having hard times. Happiness is gratitude. Looking at our lives and being grateful for the things we do have. Remembering that we matter. Our lives have purpose and meaning. Happiness is work and many times is the hardest thing we can do in this life. So if you are looking for happiness look at the things you have been blessed with. Make the choice to ask God for help in being happy. If we look, seek, ask, work for, and open the door we will become happy with time that I do promise. Happiness does not take away the mental health problems we deal with, but it does help us overcome them. God wants happiness for all his children and that includes you! So, dance your way through life, choose to be happy and never take a single breath for granted.