God's blessings are conditional

 For those who don't know I'm in the middle of writing a book about God's love and how it helps us overcome anything in this life. Although it's beginning to be bigger than I ever thought it's been leading me down a path I hadn't realized I would be walking down or needed in my life right now. I have been reading tons of conference talks about God's love and atonement one of which really stood out to me last night it's from president Nelson and is called divine love. He states "while divine love can be called perfect, infinite, enduring, and universal, it cannot correctly be characterized as unconditional." 

Until last night I always assumed that God loved us no matter what we do which is true to a certain extent. I learned that God's love is conditional and there's several verses in the scriptures that prove such. "I love them that love me; and those that seek me shall find me." Many times in the scriptures if, then, inasmuch as, expect, cannot, prove are in the scriptures proving that for God's blessings and fullness of his love to come into our lives there are certain things we must do. All that God asks boil down to the two great commandments to love God with all of our mind and heart. The second is to love our neighbors like ourselves which also includes learning to love ourselves the way God loves us. 

Now what I'm about to say may offend some and if it does I'm truly sorry but I have to stand out for what has always been true. "Wickedness never was happiness." "Come unto me and be saved. Except you shall keep my commandments ye shall in no case enter into the kingdom of  heaven." 

So how can God love everyone but his love is conditional? He loves all of us because we are his beloved children. Even his daughters and sons. There's certain laws and a order to everything under the sun. His love is conditional because in order for us to feel the fullness of his love we have things we must do. If we love him then it becomes easier to keep the commandments and promises we make to God and in return the fullness of God's love comes into our lives. As his love comes into our life it becomes easier for us to love everyone around us even those who have wronged us. There's so much more in this talk so if you have not read the talk I highly recommend reading it. Hope everyone can feel God's love and in return keep the commandments that God has given to us. I promise as we do so blessings will be poured into our lives. 

What we say and do have a huge impact on those around us

 The things we say and do have a huge impact on those around us. We need to use our words each day to build those around us up. To help them believe in themselves, in good, and in God. I never realized the power in what I have to say but lately I have been coming to understand.

I have some amazing friends who have for years kept reminding me of my worth as a daughter of God. They kept reminding me that there's a brighter future ahead for me. Kept reminding me that God was there all I needed to was pray. But it took me years to see it myself. Years to forgive myself for being so blind and stupid. But I got there with time because they never stopped using their words to uplift me when I was struggling with depression and anxiety and suicidal thoughts. You never know what your words of kindness can do for a person. The power your words have to tear someone down. Our words have more power than we can ever imagine so let's use them for good in a world that is always tearing people down let's be a force for good. 

Storms of life

 On my drive to my ysa ward it started to rain. As it rained it got me thinking about the storms of life and how I'm grateful for them. Just like rain washes away the waste and pollution from the earth the storms in our lives do likewise. The storms in our lives are the very thing that allows us to grow and flourish. Would you really want the storms to pass you by when you stop to realize that they are the very thing that makes it possible to become like God, to have all that God has? The lessons that we learn. The person we become because of the storms are they not worth everything? Do you honestly believe to become powerful will come easy? Believe me it will and needs to destroy the old person so you can become so much more! So the next time that a storm comes into your life remember that it's a blessing in disguise. All things are really for our good, even the storms of life! They are given to us because God trusts us enough to allow us to struggle, to grow, and become like him. 

Walk in a world that says we should be running

 Our world is always telling us that we need to always be running. That there's an honor in how busy a person can be. But in a world that is so busy what can help us continue to find strength to go one more day? It goes back to primary answers like so many things do. Find time to be still to reflect and the best place I have found is the temple. Read scriptures and conference talks. Find time to pray and then listen to what God has to say. There's more peace in a harsh and hurried world by living the gospel. So no matter how busy we might be we need to find time to live the gospel in its fullest. 

Faith over pain or fear

 The last few months I have been learning how to live by faith instead of allowing my pain or fear stop me from trusting the Lord. Pain and fear often times yell at us so loudly that it becomes harder to listen to the faith that we have. Sometimes our pain or fear is screaming so loudly that it feels like we don't even hear the faith or trust that we have. In those moments we need to find the faith that we have and when we do find it act on it. 

The Lord has been telling me something that seems so impossible and yet I can't deny what God has been telling me. At the same time there's been pain involved to the point that a part of me that just wants to walk away because it would be so much easier. But sometimes if we choose faith and trust blessings that we can't even comprehend come into our lives. Many times choosing faith is the harder choice we could have made but it will always bless us. 

We are never expected to hold on to things God wants us to do on our own. In my experience with this blessing that God is trying to give to me is hard but because of it the Lord has given me a few people who came into my life right before I was asked to go along with what the Lord wants me to do. 

Faith is a choice. Do we trust God or do we not? If we trust God then we choose faith even when it's the hardest choice we could ever had made. After we have made the choice of faith we have to act and continue to act on revelation that God gives to us. So if you are being asked do you have faith enough to act, remember God never leaves us on our own. 

Bring God back

 God has been taken out of almost everything in our country and we honestly wonder why we have stopped progressing as much as we used to. When I was in elementary school I remember doing the pledge every day and saying in "God we trust". Our country was based on God. 

He helped the struggling country that had no official army, no official government, very little weapons win a war with the most powerful country at the time. That didn't just happen, it happened because they would pray to God for help. God did help them and our country was based on religion and God. It prepared a place that God's kingdom could be founded. 

We started to progress even more and then we turned away from God. Now we wonder why we can't get great people in office and why it seems like God has stopped blessings us as a country. God wants to bless us even more but first we need to bring him back to the schools, our government, and the communities around us. We need to pray to God in all things. Then act like Christ did while he was alive. Start keeping God's commandments and learn to keep the higher law that God's tried to give many times and yet we as a people were not ready for the higher law. 

Are we going to make the changes in our personal lives and in the community that we live in? I promise if we do God has promised that he will bless us but it's up to us. What are we going to do? 

What is love?

 Love is gentle, compassionate, understanding, long suffering, uplifting of the other, thinking of the other ahead of yourself. Love is the most powerful thing in this world and the very thing that makes us more like the savior. The savior entire life was lead by the love he had for the world. Even his death came about because of the love he had for us his brothers and sisters. 

Since as members of Christs church on the earth if we are to be true members and more than just members in name we need to live our lives to the higher law. The law of love of putting others ahead of yourself. If you truly love someone then suffering in their behalf will never seem like a sacrifice. 

I have seen so many examples of mothers showing the love that nobody else can ever know. They give their bodies, their very name, their time and effort to their family. But in turn they tend to be the most loved. So remember that many times when we sacrifice something especially if it's hard it gives more than we sacrificed. Even though the love of a mother is no other may we remember that we don't need to be a mother to show the kind of love that's like no other. 

Hope in the darkness

 This past year has taught me that there's always hope no matter how dark it seems now. God is a god of hope and miracles. In the darkness is where we find and get close to God. So don't be afraid of the darkness or trails in your life because if you learn to draw close to God during those times not only will he help you find the courage and strength you stand in need of, but you will learn to be able to look back with gratitude in your hearts. 

This past weekend as I got a car on my way home from the dealership I couldn't stop crying. I realized that despite how hard this last year had been that I had gotten through the worst of it. There was a new beginning to the rest of my life. I not only had a car again but I had gained my freedom back. Although I couldn't ever put into words how grateful I am for such giving parents and a sister who has the biggest heart of anyone I have ever known but I not only lost my marriage, my children this past year but for a time I lost my freedom of being able to go where I need to. 

Despite losing so much I had found God and gotten to know him this past year. I had found how powerful prayer is. When we feel like we can't go one more second let alone one more day feeling the way we do we can pray and he will give us strength we didn't know we had. When we feel like life can't get any worse and there's nothing to be grateful for we will find one small thing to be grateful for. For me it was butterflies. Everytime I would see one I would stop and it gave me hope in what felt hopeless. Or I would go to my sister's house and her daughter would laugh and I would cry inside because it reminded me that life was still beautiful and joyful even if I didn't feel it in the moment. Or my baby sister who isn't really a baby anymore but in my eyes always will be no matter how old she gets to be. She would ask do you love me and are you happy. I would answer yes most of the time even though it felt like a lie until a few days ago she asked and I realized for the first time in over two years I answered yes and I meant it this time. 

I found power inside of myself that I didn't realize was even there. I found that I still had something to give even in the worst of times. I found that people's lives were better because I was in there lives. I found that friends from my past had missed me for years. I found that there was still a reason that I was alive and the cancer had been found so early on to save my life because I was still needed and it was up to me to find out why. 

So if you are going through a hard time right now remember there's always hope even in the worst of times. Things will get better with time. One day you might look back at this trying time and be grateful for it because it changed you into a better person or you might come to understand why those trails had to happen. Never give up hope even if things seem dark right now. 

Drifting in life

 Up to about a month ago I felt like I was simply drifting through my life. Then I made a choice to ask God if my life has a purpose to it? What God wanted me to do with the life I had been given. Just like God told me what I should do with my life I know that God will tell you if you as well if you simply ask and then act. Pray for everything. Pray like everything relays on God. Then work like everything is on you. As you do both God will start to give you piece by piece of the puzzle of your life. 

Learn two lessons from your failures in life. First failures aren't always what they seem. Sometimes they are the stepping stones to your successes in life. Second you are not really failing so long as you keep trying. If we living close to the spirit it will only take time to get to where we are meant to be. 

If you believe you can move mountains

 https://open.spotify.com/track/1Z25zW2xBqMHVfgYAdKeqX?si=E3nIno8UTN6iDhx2I79-vg

Faith does move mountains in our lives. Have you ever thought this darkness just won't go away? Even after getting professional help? Go to the faith that you have in the savior. The times I have felt the strongest and happiest have been when I have been close to the savior.

Peter really did walk on water. If peter could walk on water with his faith what are you capable of doing when your faith is centered on the savior? Maybe the mountain in your life will be moved if you ask for his help in your life. Pray, faith, and hard work bring about the blessings God has in store for his children. But moving a mountain is hard so don't think that with God's help it will be easy but it will be possible so don't give up! 

Have faith that God has a plan for us

 I have struggled so much of my life feeling like I was simply drifting through my life. I never realized that all of those years I thought I was simply failing in everything that I did that I was going through life without the help of God that I so needed. Everything that I have ever gone through was helping me get to where God wanted me to be in life. The trails and hard times are a huge blessing in my life. I have divine worth and I'm truly a daughter of God, just like you are. We all have power within us simply by being children of God's. We are all enough in the eyes of God so don't put limits on yourself like I have for years. God has a plan for each of us and it's more grand than we can ever imagine. But we will only reach our fullest by learning to pray and work hard. We need to learn to listen and figure out how God speaks to us, because we are all different so the way God speaks to one won't be the way he speaks to another. We need to develop the faith and trust to act on the things God tells us. God is a god of promise so he will keep the promises he makes to us, but sometimes it takes time. God really does have a plan for each of us. It's up to us to figure out the plan he has for us. 

God's love has always been there

 God loves us his children no matter what. We can never go so dark, so far away, or sin so much that his love for us stops. Others may not understand but he always will. Others may judge or bully us but God will wrap his arms around us to remind us that everything will get better with time. His love can get us though the darkessess of nights. He gives hope when nothing else can or does. He carries us if we allow him to till we can walk again on our own. 

Joy is the very purpose of God's plan for his children. So when we're in the middle of a trail may we remember that all things will bring about good if we allow it to. God wants to give joy and happiness but it won't be of this world. His joy and happiness his very love is eternal in nature. His love comforts us when we feel like we are dying inside. 

His love teaches us how we should love and serve others. He taught us how to love when he was on the cross. You think that as a god he couldn't stop the pain and jump down from the cross? Of course he could have so why didn't he? It was the love for us his brothers and sisters. As well as the knowledge of what would have happened to us if he did. He made the choice to finish the atonement. 

Because of the atonement we never have to know what it feels like to be truly alone like the savior did. When we feel alone we can get on our knees to pray and ask to feel the love that God has for us. He the savior knows what it feels to be alone because in the final hour of the atonement even heavenly father turned his back to the savior in order to complete the atonement. The savior never wants us to feel what he did because of the love he has for us. 

His love teaches us how to forgive and have compassion on those around us, including ourselves. When the savior was on the cross and experienced the worst pain ever recorded what did the savior say? He said forgive them father for they don't know what they do. He forgave the worst betrayal in history from the very ones who he was doing it for if they would accept him. He lived a life of compassion and understanding. He healed sinners every day. I honestly believe the very power of God comes from the love he has for those who are suffering. 

He taught us how to be calm in the midst of life. When the storm came on the sea he slept through it. He taught that yes there was a storm but there was no need for fear because he was on the boat. He also taught that to have faith in this life. That he as our Savior is the calm and the thing we can have faith on even in the middle of trails in this life. Did he teach with anger? Of course not, he taught with love. 

Even his anger came from love. When the savior saw what the people were doing to the father's house how did he react? He overthrow the money changers tables. He couldn't stand by without doing something because he loved heavenly father so much. He taught never allow something to stand just because others say it's ok. He taught us to stand up for what we believe but make sure it comes from love. 

The savior taught us to be selfless by the way he lived his life with love for others. There was never one moment of his life that he thought about himself. He was always thinking about those around him who was struggling. In fact many of his miracles came about because of the love he had for those around him. The many healings that he performed came about because of the love he had for them. Feeding of thousands came about because he saw that they were hungry and he could help them. Walking on the water of peter came about because of peters faith in the savior. When his faith failed the savior reached out to bring him up again. Forgiveness came about because of the love he had for those who failed and continued to try. Raising the dead came about to show his power that came about from his love. All of these miracles happened because of the love the savior has for those around him. Those miracles continue to this day. 

He taught us to be like a small child because their love is so pure. Children teach us so much. They teach to keep things simple. To see the beauty around us. How to make friends. If we as a people as a society would be so much better if we would act the way a small child does. After all why do you think children brighten whatever room they enter?

He taught us how to see the one who was forgotten or alone. He would leave the 99 to go to the one. He ministered to the one many times. When the woman was caught in adulty the savior told the crowd that the one without sin be the first to cast the stone. So the crowd left one by one. When he was alone with the woman he told her to go and sin no more. He loved her deeply even though she had just sinned. Do you honestly believe the savior loves you any less than he loved that woman? 

The savior taught us how to love without expecting anything in return. He gave everything while he lived. He gave his time, love, resources to those around him. Then he bled from every pore. To finish his life with love he died on the cross for us. The only thing he desires is the best for us. For us his brothers and sisters to live with our heavenly parents forever. But even when we make choices to lead us away from God he never stops loving us and never will. 

I have found the love the savior has for me personally at the least expected time. After my second divorce I would lay on my bed after crying for hours on end. I would then pour my heart to God asking what worth do I have? How did he see me? Was all the promises he had made me a lie? Was I worth loving? Was I ever going to have anything last? Would I ever live a successful life? Was this all life would ever be like or was there more to life than pain and tears? 

God wrapped his arms around me. I had some amazing friends who because they were living close to the spirit God was able to use them to answer my prayers. They would have the courage to say what I needed to hear. God love for me has shined through such a hard time. 

I started to realize that the worth that I had just by being myself was more amazing than I ever imagined possible. I started to realize that I really could dream big and reach for the stars. I started to make my dreams a reality after years of holding myself back. I also realized that God has always used me to show his love for his children. The more I believe in myself the more the Lord will be able to use myself to shine his love to the world. 

Are you holding yourself back from all that God has in store for you? After all one of God's ways to show love is our agency. The choices we make does effect forever. So we use agency to not only honor God but to reach for the stars and the dreams you have. God will help us make our dreams a reality so long as you use prayer to make sure that you are on the right path that God wants for you. 

We are all children of God. As such we all have divine worth, divine possibilities. It's never too late to get back on track in our lives. We just need a few things in order to get back on track. First we need prayer, the holy Ghost, God's power in our lives. Second we need believe in ourselves, forgiveness of ourselves as well as others, compassion, understanding, hard work, and dreams. Third we need to take care of ourselves mentally, emotionally, physically, and spiritually. As we focus on these three areas of our lives our fullest potential, our very divine selves will shine forth. We will also feel the love that God has for us as well as all of God's children.